Former England skipper Lewis Moody has disclosed he has been diagnosed with motor neurone disease and stated he cannot yet confront the full implications of the muscle-deteriorating condition that claimed the lives of other rugby players Doddie Weir and Rob Burrow.
The 47-year-old athlete, who was part of the World Cup champion 2003 side and lifted several English and European titles with Leicester, gave an interview to BBC Breakfast a fortnight after discovering he has the condition.
"There's something about looking the future in the face and hesitating to fully comprehend that at the moment," he stated.
"It's not that I fail to comprehend where it's going. We comprehend that. But there is certainly a unwillingness to confront the future for now."
Moody, speaking together with his wife Annie, says rather he feels "calm" as he focuses on his immediate health, his family and making preparations for when the disease deteriorates.
"Possibly that's shock or perhaps I deal with matters in another way, and once I have the information, it's simpler," he stated further.
Initial Signs
Moody found out he had MND after noticing some weakness in his shoulder area while training in the gym.
After physical therapy was ineffective for the issue, a set of scans showed nerve cells in his brain and spinal cord had been compromised by MND.
"You're presented with this medical finding of MND and we're appropriately quite emotional about it, but it's quite odd because I think nothing's wrong," he added.
"I don't feel ill. I don't sense unwell
"My indications are rather minimal. I have some muscle deterioration in the hand area and the shoulder.
"I continue to be able to accomplishing anything and everything. And hopefully that will continue for as long as is feasible."
Illness Advancement
MND can develop swiftly.
According to the non-profit MND Association, the disease takes the lives of a one-third of people within a 365 days and more than half within 24 months of detection, as eating and breathing become increasingly challenging.
Medical care can only slow deterioration.
"It's never me that I am upset for," added an affected Moody.
"It's about the grief around having to break the news to my mum - as an only child - and the consequences that has for her."
Household Effect
Conversing from the household with his wife and their canine companion by his side, Moody was consumed with feeling when he discussed breaking the news to his sons - 17-year Dylan and 15-year Ethan - the devastating news, stating: "That represented the hardest thing I've ever had to do."
"These are two brilliant boys and that was pretty devastating," Moody stated.
"We sat on the couch in tears, Ethan and Dylan both embraced in each other, then the dog jumped over and started cleaning the tears off our faces, which was somewhat amusing."
Moody stated the priority was remaining in the now.
"We have no cure and that is why you have to be very strongly directed on just accepting and appreciating all aspects now," he stated.
"According to Annie, we've been very lucky that the primary choice I made when I left playing was to devote as much time with the kids as possible. We don't get those times back."
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Professional competitors are unevenly affected by MND, with research suggesting the rate of the disease is up to 600% elevated than in the wider community.
It is considered that by limiting the O2 available and producing damage to nerve cells, consistent, strenuous training can activate the disease in those previously predisposed.
Rugby Playing Days
Moody, who gained 71 England caps and toured with the British and Irish Lions in New Zealand in 2005, was dubbed 'Mad Dog' during his sports career, in honour of his courageous, relentless approach to the game.
He played through a fracture of his leg for a time with Leicester and once caused a practice confrontation with colleague and friend Martin Johnson when, irritated, he discarded a practice gear and started throwing himself into tackles.
After coming on as a substitute in the Rugby World Cup final win over Australia in 2003, he claimed a ball at the back of the throw-in in the crucial phase of play, creating a base for half-back Matt Dawson to snipe and Jonny Wilkinson to kick the game-deciding drop kick.
Backing System
Moody has previously informed Johnson, who led England to that title, and a few other previous players about his medical situation, but the rest will be finding out his news with the broader public.
"There will be a period when we'll need to lean on their support but, at the moment, just having that sort of care and acceptance that people are there is all that matters," he stated.
"The sport is such a great community.
"I said to the kids the other day, I've had an amazing life.
"Even when it ended now, I've enjoyed all of it and embraced all of it and got to do it with unbelievable people.
"Being able to call your enthusiasm your career, it's one of the greatest blessings.
"Having accomplished it for so long a time with the groups that I did it with was a joy. And I am aware they will wish to help in whatever way they can and I await having those discussions."
